Four Principles – How to Get Along With Others

By Shicheng

As a Christian, we all know that we should live out normal humanity. When interacting with brothers and sisters, we should love each other, understand, forbear and forgive each other, and help each other. This is the Lord’s requirement for every Christian and also what we should practice. Thank the Lord for His guidance! Regarding this topic, I’ll talk about my understanding. In my opinion, there are four basic aspects that we should enter into to live out normal humanity. The first aspect is that brothers and sisters should love each other. Second, we should deal with others with wisdom. Third, we should correctly view others’ merits and shortcomings, neither overestimating nor underestimating others. Fourth, we should also possess conscience, reason, and integrity in interacting with others. If we can practice and enter into these four aspects, then we will meet the basic conditions for living out of the normal humanity Christians should possess. Now, let’s talk about the four aspects in detail.

Four Principles - How to Get Along With Others1

Firstly, brothers and sisters should love each other. The Lord Jesus said, “A new commandment I give to you, That you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another” (John 13:34). This is the Lord Jesus’ requirement for every believer in Him. Because we all can be weak and have shortcomings, it is necessary for brothers and sisters to help and support each other. If we take the Lord Jesus Christ as our exemplar and make our interactions with others established on the basis of loving each other, then we can live in harmony with people. For example, on one occasion, Sister Li and I were to support a weak brother together. I heard Sister Li say, “The brother knows the Bible well and looks down on average people. Every time we visited him, he always talked too much, and we could never get a word in edgewise.” Hearing this, I thought the brother was too arrogant, thus secretly disdaining him. Living in a wrong state, I was incapable of treating him with a loving heart, and thought to myself, “For such an arrogant person, will my visit to him achieve results?” I lost my confidence for a moment. In helplessness, I could only pray and seek the Lord. Then I reflected and realized that I was arrogant too. When I was negative and weak, God not only ignored my corruption and disobedience but also made me come out of the passivity and weakness through brothers and sisters helping me with a loving heart. I thought of the Lord’s love for me. I also thought: The Lord was crucified for saving us. His love for us is so great. But why can’t I imitate the Christ to be tolerant and patient toward brothers and sisters, and to help them with a loving heart? When I transformed my condition and faced with the brother with a love for man’s soul, the fact was not what I had imagined. The brother was not so arrogant, and he didn’t keep talking himself. Instead, he spoke heart-to-heart with us. After we communicated and shared God’s words with each other, the brother’s negative situation improved. Thank God for His guidance! All the glory be to our Lord! From this, we can see that only with God’s guidance in our heart can we live by His word and have a loving heart for brothers and sisters. Just as the Lord Jesus said, “By this shall all men know that you are my disciples, if you have love one to another” (John 13:35).

Second, we should deal with others with wisdom. We are all corrupted by Satan with the result that there are many corrupt dispositions in every one of us. Besides, we don’t love the truth by nature. Therefore, it is inevitable to have difficulties in dealing with others. Not only should we possess a loving heart for others, but wisdom is indispensable. The Bible says, “The wise in heart shall be called prudent: and the sweetness of the lips increases learning. Understanding is a wellspring of life to him that has it” (Proverbs 16:21-22). From these words, we can see that wisdom is positive, and that if we have wisdom we can complete things easily and become a prudent man. Furthermore, we Christians are principled in using wisdom. Our use of wisdom in order to complete positive things, to benefit the work of the church, and not to bring harm to ourselves, others or the church. Without wisdom, we can’t have some problems solved easily. For example, if we directly say some words to brothers and sisters, it may harm them. In this case, we can do it in a wise way in which we can solve problems and avoid bringing them harm. Thus, under some special circumstances, we need to rely on wisdom from God to speak and act. As long as we do everything on the foundation of God’s love, it will achieve good results. For wisdom comes from God. As it is said in the Bible, “The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom” (Psalms 111:10).

Four Principles - How to Get Along With Others

Third, we should correctly view others’ merits and shortcomings, neither overestimating nor underestimating others. The Scripture reads, “And these things, brothers, I have in a figure transferred to myself and to Apollos for your sakes; that you might learn in us not to think of men above that which is written, that no one of you be puffed up for one against another” (1 Corinthians 4:6). Having been corrupted by Satan, we are all arrogant so we can’t correctly view others’ merits and shortcomings. We either overestimate or underestimate others. For example, if we have some special skill, we will love to reveal ourselves; if others have, we will worship and look up to them, unable to give glory to God. If we have some shortcomings, we will be self-abased; if others have, we will belittle and underestimate them, incapable of treating ourselves and others correctly. Especially seeing others’ shortcomings, we like to judge and belittle them because of our arrogant disposition. If we can recognize our own corruption and shortcomings, and can pursue the truth to change our corruption and take away our shortcomings, then we will be able to treat others correctly. When brothers and sisters’ opinions and views don’t agree with ours, we should humble ourselves, respect their opinions, and seek fellowship with each other to understand more truth, instead of holding to ourselves. Because we are different in caliber given by God and in the time that we have believed in God, we shouldn’t make demands of others according to our own standards. Whether brothers and sisters are clever or stupid, whether they have good caliber or bad caliber, and whether they are rich or poor, we shouldn’t neither be prejudiced toward them, nor impose our own preferences onto them, nor make a fuss with them, nor look up to them or look down on them; rather, we should help and forbear them with a loving heart and treat them fairly.

Fourth, we should also possess conscience, reason, and integrity in interacting with others. If someone is kind to us, we should repay him. If someone has a loving heart for us, we should treat him with a loving heart in return. When it comes to reason, we should learn how to respect others. Even though someone has shortcomings, we must not laugh at or look down on him. When it comes to integrity, we shouldn’t be a selfish and base person who takes advantage of others. In addition, we must not speak filthy and dirty words. And we must live out the decency of saints. In brief, we should be a qualified creation with the likeness of an honest person. We should be trustworthy in words and actions and do our best to fulfil our promises to others. We shouldn’t be one way in front of people’s face and another way behind people’s back. For God likes honest people and only honest people can enter into the kingdom of heaven. Just as the Lord Jesus said, “Truly I say to you, Except you be converted, and become as little children, you shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven” (Matthew 18:3).

The four aspects above are what we Christians should practice and entry into. If we can do these, we will be able to live out normal humanity, have normal human relationships, and have some human likeness, and only then can we glorify God and benefit others.

If you have other understanding or new light about this article, you’re welcome to have a chat with us via the online chat window at the bottom of the website or send an email to [email protected]. We Look forward to sharing with more brothers and sisters about your enlightenment from God and growing together in Christ.

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