I Have Known How to Get Along With My Colleague

By Zhang Yili

December 11, 2017 Monday Clear


Recently, our department has been short of staff and the work in the company rather busy. Every one of us works like two, and has to work overtime every day. Our company has been trying to recruit new members to our department. Today, the head of the company called and told me that a new employee will come over tomorrow, and that he had e-mailed me her resume. I opened the email and read her resume, I came to know her name was Xiao Wei, and she had some work experience in planning. I could see from her resume that she was quite good in every way. After coming into our department, she would surely be a great help. I look forward to her joining us tomorrow!

December 12, 2017 Tuesday Cloudy to Dull

Early this morning, I walked into the office and a strange figure came into my sight. I guessed right that it was Xiao Wei. The other colleagues were all greeting her warmly and arranging her desk. Then, each of us made a self-introduction. Out of politeness, I, as the head of the office, explained to her the related rules and regulations of the company and the scope of the work of our department. She humbly and attentively listened to my explanation. It was finished after half an hour, and then we all got down to work. Through carefully observing how she did her work, I found she was rather cautious, feeling that our company really had vision, and soon she would take up the job by herself. However, in the afternoon, Xiao Wei asked me many questions at a stretch, and said that the form contents were very complicated and she was unfamiliar with many English code words. So I taught her patiently. When seeing her get somewhat nervous as a result of being strange to the work, I comforted her hurriedly, “Don’t be nervous. You’ve just entered our company, so it is normal that you are strange to many things now. It will be all right when you get familiar with them after a few days.” At my words, she nodded humbly. Then I hurried back to my desk and started working against the clock because there were a lot of data to be sorted.

However, I heard Xiao Wei’s voice again barely half an hour later, which said, “Director Zhang, I still can’t get my head around this form. Would you kindly look at it for me?” At that time, I was busy working on a pressing document. So I became impatient right away as soon as I heard she call me. I thought: I have explained it so clearly to you, but why do you still not know how to deal with it? The leader is pushing me for the data I’m dealing with. If I stop to help you, wouldn’t my task be delayed? But then, when I thought that I couldn’t lose my image as a director, I had to force a smile and teach her again.

At 5 p.m., it was time to get off work. All the colleagues had left but only Xiao Wei and I remained. She was still working busily and nervously. Then, I went over and said to her, “Xiao Wei, it’s time to get off work.” She said, “Yeah, but I’ll get this finished first.” “So how’s your first day working in our company? Have you gotten used to everything here?” asked I with concern. She answered, “I felt quite stressed. As I am not familiar with the work of the company and have never used this kind of form before.” Upon hearing this, I got very disappointed at once: What should I do? Making up this form is quite an important job, and I’m thinking of charging her with the work. But she has never contacted the work before, wouldn’t she still ask me about it later? The work of the company is quite busy this month, and I have already been very stressed. If I still have to juggle my work and her work, then I will have to handle too many things at once. I don’t want to spread myself too thin. And then if the leader asks me whether I have finished my share of work, what shall I say? I cannot possibly tell her that I have spent my time training Xiao Wei. Otherwise, how would she think of me? Unknowingly, I began to complain: Why did the company recruit a new member before being clear about her professional competence? Alas, I felt so upset.


On the way home, I walked with the leader. I told her about Xiao Wei’s case, but she said to me, “She has her own strengths. And she has just joined your department, so it’s normal that she doesn’t know how to do her work. You should teach her patiently.” Hearing her words, I could say nothing but echoed his words, “Well, I’ll just help her more.”

December 18, 2017 Monday Overcast

Today is the seventh day that Xiao Wei has come into the company, and she has almost got the form taped. But there were always mistakes here or there in each piece of work she did, and as a result, I had to take pains to correct it. Today, her work was so badly done that I almost did it all over again. At this thought, I felt very depressed. She ought to have taken on part of the work of the department, but instead of that, she has caused me a lot of bother because of her being unfamiliar with her work. I thought: Is she not fit to work in our department?

December 19, 2017 Tuesday Clear

During the lunch break, I overheard Xiao Wei speak to other colleagues, “I have been here for a week, but I still feel very stressed. I’m still raw to my work, and often make mistakes, and have to have you revise them or make some additions to them. I felt so sorry about it. …” There was a strongly nasal tone in her voice; I thought she must have cried. After hearing her words, other colleagues all encouraged her.

Having heard Xiao Wei’s words, I felt somewhat sad because I could understand how stressed she was when she had just joined our company and was unfamiliar with her work. When I had just come to work here, I had the same feelings as her. At that time, the leader and my colleagues often helped and encouraged me, and only thus had I gone through that period. But why do I expect so much of Xiao Wei? With some distress, I came to God’s presence and prayed, “Oh God! The new employee has been working here for a week, but she is still unfamiliar with her work, always making me worry. Thus I disliked and belittled her, and even thought she was not fit to work in our department. I know I was wrong to do so, but I have no idea why I treated her like this. May You guide me.”

After praying, I saw some of God’s words, “All people live for themselves. Every man for himself and the devil take the hindmost—this is the summation of man’s nature.” “What is contained within people’s nature? I’ve discovered that, regardless of what happens to them, or what they’re dealing with, people always protect their own interests and look out for their own flesh…. They make these demands and claims for their own sakes, or else they try to justify and look for excuses for their own sakes, and in many things it can be seen that everything they do is without sense, it is totally devoid of sense, which is full proof of the satanic logic of ‘Everyone for himself and the devil take the hindmost.’” The revelation of God’s words made me feel shamed and embarrassed. Under the influence of satanic poison of “Everyone for himself and the devil take the hindmost,” I had paid too much attention to my personal interests. Wasn’t it just because of this that I couldn’t treat Xiao Wei fairly? When she had just come here, I thought that she was going to share in the work of our department and thereby my pressure could be relieved and the work of our department could be done better. However, her professional skill was not so good as I had imaged, so I needed to spare some time to help her. Moreover, despite having worked in the company for a week, she was still unfamiliar with her work and had made many mistakes in her work, which caused me to put my work by to help her. As a result, my own task was delayed. This directly influenced my performance figures and tarnished my good image in the leader’s heart. Such a person who held me back and was inimical to my interests, how could I tolerate her? Therefore, I began to have an aversion to her, and even thought she was not fit to work in our department and wanted to kick her out. I saw from this that I was so selfish. I truly could do anything which benefited myself at the expense of others to protect my own interests. My doing things in this way is a display of a loss of humanity and also detested by God. I can’t live by satanic poison like this any longer.

Later on, I saw the following two passages from Sermons and Fellowship on Entry Into Life, “We should have several principles of practice if we want to get along with others normally. We cannot be satisfied with nothing more than not taking unfair advantage of and not harming others. Besides, we should have love and have conscience and reason even more; we should tolerate and help each other and care for others so that others can benefit in all things; we should think about others but not only think about ourselves, should sympathize with others’ weaknesses and pardon others’ transgressions. Only with these principles can we establish the normal relationship with others, and be on friendly terms with others.” “We should treat others properly, neither overestimating nor underestimating any of them. …When doing things, we should take account not only of our own interests, but also of others’. Besides, we should learn to be more considerate to others, to benefit them…. Do not ask too much of others, and do not expect to gain any benefits from others—this is also a principle of treating others properly.” These words showed me a path to practice: I shouldn’t only consider my own interests, but must put them aside and consider others’ interests. I should treat others fairly instead of having excessively high requirements of them or expecting to gain benefits from them; I should help others more. Xiao Wei is new here and is still unfamiliar with her work; thus I sure can’t require or measure her by the standards of a veteran worker but should treat her fairly and help her patiently and with love. This is what I should do. Having understood these, I decided to put aside my personal interests and help her with love.

December 20, 2017 Wednesday Clear

Today, I again explained in detail to Xiao Wei her work, showed her where she had made mistakes, and told her my work experience. When I did so, I felt much relieved in my heart, being no longer impatient. While I was saying, Xiao Wei, still so humble, listened attentively, and a smile appeared on her face.

At the approach of noon, the company urgently required us to design a planning document. Yet none of us were familiar with this type of planning, but Xiao Wei said she wanted to have a try. Shortly after, she told us her opinions and the problems of the planning book, and soon finished modifying it. What she did totally overturned what I thought of her, making me look at her with new eyes. I had regarded her as someone that could not keep up with us and even held us back, yet beyond my expectation, today she had brought up so many good ideas about the planning book and finished modifying it by herself. After the planning book was handed in, she was praised by the company. At the time, I felt shame that I had looked down on her before and felt guilty about paying too much attention to my personal interests.

December 25, 2017 Monday Clear

After work, when I was lying down and resting on the sofa, I recalled that Xiao Wei had come up with many good ideas, and contributed a lot to our department. This made me see a completely new Xiao Wei. Through interacting with her these days, I have just realized that if we want to get along well with others, at first, we should put aside our own interests, and then learn to treat others fairly, help others with love, and show consideration for others. In addition, we shouldn’t belittle others when finding their shortcomings, but should learn to find their strengths. If we treat others with such an attitude, then we will surely have no trouble getting along with others. Thank God for His guidance!

You may be interested in this article: How to Get On Well With New Partner

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