A disease made my marriage go in another way. In God’s words, I understand why I couldn’t control my marriage and I no longer hold the point of view “I’ll determine my marriage.”
A Storm Arising From House Property
I’m an only child. I grew up in my parents’ tender love, and moreover lived in an advantaged condition. Since I got married, my husband and I had always lived in my parents’ home. My husband was in charge of our home life, while I worked outside. We lived in perfect harmony. After my parents’ death, the salaries and house property were all in my charge, and naturally I held the purse string, which made me feel very secure. What’s more, I always had the final say in my family. I remembered there was a time when I played mahjong; I lost over 20,000 yuan after playing for a week in a row. My family persuaded me to give up it. I said to them, “I earned the money. It’s up to me how to use it. I’ll do whatever I want. None of your business.” At my words, my family could not say anything else. Just then, I thought: It seems that I’d better hold on to money in my own hands at any time. Otherwise, I won’t be so free to do whatever I like.
The Curtain Rises on the Storm Arising From House Property
One day, I took the residence booklet just in time to see the property ownership certificate. I opened it and had a look, only to find the name of the householder became my husband’s. I rubbed my eyes and looked at it over and over again. After I confirmed that the householder was my husband, I immediately became a little annoyed. I thought, “How could the fortune inherited from my parents belong to him? Could it be that he changed the householder of the property ownership certificate without my leave?” The more I thought about it, the angrier I got: The property which rightly belongs to me has now become my husband’s. The house we live in and the house my parents left me are both in his name. As such, don’t I own nothing? At the thought of this, I went to ask my husband about it. Who knew that he also was perplexed. He said in an injured voice that he was in the dark about it. But how could I believe him? After quarreling with him, I went out with the property ownership certificate and the residence booklet. I thought all the way: Regardless of whether he admits it, my highest priority is to put the name right. The house is actually mine. What should I do if I lose it? No one knows what will happen in the future. Supposing that I die earlier than him, will he marry again? Will he give our fortune to outsiders? The more I thought, the more I was anxious. I couldn’t wait to change the name of householder to mine.
In the days that followed, I was running around the police station, the Housing Management Bureau and the Land Bureau. In the meantime, I continuously copied documents, collected evidence and gave certificates. I also inquired of some friends who were familiar with the law concerning the inheritance law. Besides, I searched the relevant information on the Internet. In order to change the householder, I had been undergoing many twists and turns and beating my brains over it. Once I complained to my daughter about this matter. However, she said soothingly, “My dad definitely won’t do that. He knows you are the householder; how could he possibly write the name wrongly?” By then, I recollected that the community once helped all dwellers have the property ownership certificates. There was a very good chance that they got the wrong name. At that time, I half regretted that I might do my husband an injustice. But on second thoughts, even so, still I must correct it. As the saying goes, “There is no better things than funneling all into our own pockets.” Only when the house was transferred into my name could I feel reassured. And so, more than ten days later, I went through all formalities. Unexpectedly, the Housing Management Bureau finally let me wait for a response. They said I must wait the unified handling. So I had no choice but to give up. However, I had not reconciled with this. When getting home, I hid all the certificates. I meant to take out it in person until I got the notice of the Housing Management Bureau.
A Cold War Is on Show
From then on, I was unwilling to acknowledge my husband at home. While his manner to me also became distant. He formerly would cook breakfast after getting up, but now he was wrapped in profound repose every morning and occasionally made lunch, so I had to cook myself. When just the two of us were at home, we almost had no words to say. Even if we had to do something, we would let our children deliver messages. In the beginning, I justified myself and didn’t want to bow my head to him. As time went on, I was unwilling to face this situation and then I began to escape it. After work, I played mahjong with my friends and usually didn’t go home until midnight. My husband not only turned a blind eye to me, he did also not go home, and even sometimes he didn’t go back for a week. At night, I parked myself on the sofa alone, feeling very miserable. Thinking our relationship got like this, I was so distressed within. Just like that, the cold war between us continued for over a month. Only then did I realize the situation was somewhat serious. Then I began to speak to him on my own initiative, yet he still treated me with a cold. One night, he came drunk. On his arrival home, he complained, “I have paid so much for our family. I never expected that you argued with me about a name of the householder. You were not trusting me the whole time. I say we’d better live apart.” Hearing this, my eyes immediately streamed with tears. I never suspected for a minute that because of the name of the householder, our relations developed to this stage. But I had a second thought: The house is inherited from my parents. It is the most reasonable thing to change the name of the householder to mine. Is it wrong? This was the first time our feelings for each other had crumbed in over thirty years. I was so agonized, having no idea what to do.
God’s Words Settle Our Dispute
Afterward, I accepted God’s work in the last days. At meetings, I expressed my difficulty to the brothers and sisters. They told me to readmore and God’s words can solve all difficulties and problems. In the meetings, I fellowshiped about God’s words and shared experiences with my brothers and sisters, and gradually, I felt a great release in my heart.
One day, I saw the following words which attracted me immediately. God says, “When one has parents, one believes that one’s parents are everything; when one has property, one thinks that money is one’s mainstay, that it is one’s asset in life; when people have status, they cling tightly to it and would risk their lives for its sake. Only when people are about to let go of this world do they realize that the things they spent their lives pursuing are nothing but fleeting clouds, none of which they can hold onto, none of which they can take with them, none of which can exempt them from death, none of which can provide company or consolation to a lonely soul on its way back; and least of all, none of which can give a person salvation, allow them to transcend death.” After reading these words, I reflected on most of my life: Though I own the house, money and children, yet which can I take with me on the day of my death. When my parents, who adored me most, passed away, nothing could detain them no matter how much money they had made. For all that I had some money, come to think of it, money couldn’t buy me health or happiness, much less long life. On the day of my death, I could only leave with the naked body and couldn’t take anything with me. At this moment, I suddenly found everything I possessed was fleeting clouds.
I also remembered the household of my uncle. They, because of a trifle, argued with their neighbor furiously. Even the two families came to blows. As a result, my sister-in-law was irritated so much that she fainted on the spot. Then she was hospitalized and diagnosed as encephalorrhagia. Having been unconscious for three months, she came round, but it left sequela on her. Even now, she couldn’t speak clearly. After that, my uncle took his neighbor to court. However, in the end, the neighbor only paid them 2,000 yuan compensation by bribing the judge. Consequently, my uncle passed away from depression and sickness after three years. Thinking carefully—my uncle fell out with others just over some benefit and finally lost his life; I, owing to the name of the householder, landed my husband and myself in the cold war, with the result that we lost confidence in each other and our feelings were in danger. I reflected on myself: Even if I own all the properties and money, can I take any one with me when I let go of this world? No! Then what is the use of fighting over them? Why torture myself? At this point, God’s words made me philosophical. I didn’t want to vie for them. I would give up the name of the householder and live by God’s words.
Later my husband was faced with a financial matter when he was associated with his friends in business. He was fretting over this issue. Seeing he was in an acute pain, I took all money out from my wage card of my own accord to help him turn over in business. He was very surprised by my action. Our relationship gradually eased ever afterward.
I No Longer Fight for the Property
Not long after, my husband said to me, “The community informed us of taking out the property ownership certificate. You just go.” On hearing that, I was very happy, thinking: I finally see this day. Today I will pass the ownership of the house to myself. But when I hurried to take out the property ownership certificate and the residence booklet, God’s words occurred to me, “Only when people are about to let go of this world do they realize that the things they spent their lives pursuing are nothing but fleeting clouds, none of which they can hold onto, none of which they can take with them….” The enlightenment of God’s words woke me with a start. I paused to ask myself: How come I still pay attention to this? Why do I still scramble for this worldly possession? Didn’t I make my decision before God? Thereupon I calmed myself down, went back to my room and read God’s words. I happened to see God’s words, “the most important thing is to look at a person’s nature from the perspective of his world view, view of life, and values. Those who are of the devil all live for themselves. Their way of life and guiding maxims are mainly those words that come from Satan like, “Everyone for himself and the devil take the hindmost.” The words of those fiends, great ones, and philosophers of the earth have become their life. … There are still many satanic poisons in people’s lives, in their doings, and in their conduct and dealings with others—they are almost without a shred of truth—for example, their life philosophies, their maxims for success, or their ways of doing things. Every person is filled with the poisons of the great red dragon, and they all come from Satan. So, what flows through people’s bones and blood are all things of Satan.” God’s words woke me up from my slumber. Giving some thought to the reason why I wanted to transfer the house property into my name, wasn’t it because I lived by Satan’s wrong rules of living, such as “Everyone for himself and the devil take the hindmost” and “Money makes the mare go”? I thought money and houses were the wealth of survival and the mainstay of life, so I hung on to them for dear life. Under the domination of satanic poisons, I became selfish and contemptible, only considering my own interest and thoughts instead of my husband’s feelings. In consequence, what I had brought to him was harm and also we were estranged from each other, losing confidence in each other. Only then did I see that I was harmed so badly by Satan. If I continued living by these wrong rules of living, I would have less and less humanity and could not get along with my family. Then I made up my mind not to live by these meaningless and worthless things. I would live according to God’s words and set aside these worldly possessions.
Hereupon I gave all the certificates to my husband and said, “You arrange it! I have believed in God. I know these are the worldly possessions. They make no sense to me. Just write the name however you want.” He looked at me in great surprise, saying, “You don’t want it? Did I hear right? Can you truly set aside your lifeblood?” I said firmly, “I’m telling you. It is God’s words that change my view. We are a family. So it is equal to me whose name is written on.” He nodded and praised repeatedly, “The God you believe in is so powerful that He can change you. It hasn’t been easy!” At his words, I was so grateful to God. It was God’s words that made me neglect these things and let me not sink into the pain of scrambling for money.
Acting by God’s Words, I Feel Peaceful And Released
Subsequently, I proactively handed over all property to my husband, which I had kept for 30 years, including savings, bank deposit and insurance. Furthermore, I did the cooking on my own initiative. Seeing my changes, my husband said surprisingly, “The God you believe in has really changed you. You are totally not the same as before. I’m so impressed! Let me read God’s words later on.” I said with great joy, “Certainly.” From then on, we read God’s words and listened to the readings of God’s words together every morning. He likes the videos of the readings of God’s words best. As soon as he watched the videos, he was very complimentary about them, saying, “God’s words are really good! If everyone acts according to God’s words, then the family won’t have problems and there is no war in the world.”
In that experience, I truly appreciated that when I put these money and property aside, I wasn’t left out in the cold, but instead was respected by my family. In addition, my husband and I trust each other even more. Now I have seen that money and property can’t ensure our feelings or my marriage, let alone my life. They are not my living capital. Only God is the foundation for our existence. God’s words are our guide to life. Only through living by God’s words can we live out normal humanity. It was God’s words that made my family become harmonious again and it is also His words that make me feel more relaxed and released! Thank God!
All the glory be to God!
Dear brothers and sisters, if you have any understanding or enlightenment from God, welcome to share with us via:1. The online chat window at the bottom of the website. 2. Send an email to [email protected].We sincerely hope we’ll grow spiritually through sharing with each other.