A disease made my marriage go in another way. In God’s words, I understand why I couldn’t control my marriage and I no longer hold the point of view “I’ll determine my marriage.”
Find the Right One God Prepared for Me
Boys and girls, teaching buildings and dormitories, they are easily connected with schoolyard crushes. As time goes by, these crushes are set as fond memories, sealed in a diary called MEMORY. Years later, when a girl opens her diary, memories are replaying like movie scenes one after another …
On a bright sunny afternoon, students were buzzing in the classroom. The girl’s deskmate asked another classmate, “Have you ever thought of what your future boyfriend will be like?” Hearing this, the girl supported her head on one hand, falling into deep thought: What will my boyfriend be like? A teen, in the prime of youth, always has great longings for the future. The girl was tall among other teenage girls, neither fat nor thin, and with a sharp chin on her oval face, she was not that outstanding but still eye-catching. She had her standard for her future boyfriend, and she expected him to be tall and thin and good-looking—even if he was not that outstanding, he should not be too ugly.
Time was flying, and in an instant, the girl got into the university where students could live as they liked, such as wearing their favorite make-up, dressing casually, and falling in love without restraint. However, such a free life was detested by the girl somewhat, because it allowed most girls to dress gorgeously to keep beginning a new crush, and abortions to be common. So although many classmates said to the girl, “Dress up and you will look prettier,” she remained unmoved. She told herself, “I can’t follow the crowd because I’m a. I will choose my boyfriend with the aim of marriage, and I won’t accept premarital sex.”
The girl’s first year in university was going to end with the final examination. “I can head for home in only three days,” she counted and longed. Just then, a profile photo on the list of her QQ friends popped up. It was a message from her junior middle school classmate, saying, “I heard from a classmate that your school hasn’t broken up, but ours has. I’m doing a part-time job nearby your school. How about having a gathering in your spare time?” Reading the message, the girl couldn’t help recalling her middle school days, when she was still the tallest girl among others, and the boy often sparred with her over who was taller. At that time, the boy was very cute in her eyes. … “It’s been four years since we last met. Has he grown taller?” wondered the girl. Then, she agreed to the boy’s proposal. On the meeting day, the girl looked the boy up and down, as did the boy. She said, “Wow! You are nearly taller than me by ahead.” The boy smiled and said, “Yeah. You are more beautiful now. I believe you will be more beautiful if you apply some make-up.” To the boy’s words, the girl didn’t give much thought. Later, because the boy had to go back to work, they didn’t talk long before they parted.
The final examination came to an end, and the girl was finally on the homeward train. The boy phoned the girl again, asking, “You are on your way home?” She said, “Yeah. What’s up?” Following this was a momentary silence. Then the boy continued, “I’ve considered one thing carefully for a whole day. I think I’ve fallen for you …” Hearing this, the girl was dazed. After some thought she replied, “I know what you mean. I need to think about it.” The boy agreed.
The boy’s home was not far from the girl’s. When only half a month was left before the new term began, the boy came home and asked to meet the girl. Unlike others who only made a boyfriend for fun, the girl wanted a mate who had similar ideals and beliefs with her. Then she thought of two passages of words in a spiritual book: “It’s proper to get married when you are old enough, but you should choose the right one…
How you choose determines the path you will walk, and the destination you will have. The key is whether you can choose your path according to God’s requirements.” “When you are mature and want to start a family, what kind of partner will you choose? Is this related to your life outlook and your life values? (Yes.) They are closely related. If your life outlook and your life values are after God’s will, they are based on the truth. If your partner is of Satan and walks the path of Satan, then your marriage will not stand. Isn’t it so? This will cause the couple to share the same bed but dream different dreams, and they both will suffer. Is that the case? So your life outlook and your life values really matter a lot.”
These words were of great influence to the girl. In the past, the girl expected her boyfriend to be tall, thin, and handsome—this standard could only satisfy her vanity but could not necessarily bring her happiness. After mature consideration, she readjusted her viewpoint, and decided to meet the boy who was up to her standard in height, weight, appearance, and education background. But there was something that she must make clear at first, for example, whether the boy supported her belief in God, because this concerned whether they two could walk the same path. The girl thought it very good to believe in God since it could help her see through the evil of the society, not to follow it, and according to God’s requirements walk the right way of life. She hoped not only could the boy not oppose her but he could believe in God. So, when the appointed time came, she went to meet the boy. She said she was a Christian, and she told him about the truths contained within. Over their talk, several friends of the boy came and left after making a joke at them and then came again, with a water melon for them. This put a frown of anger on the face of the girl. Maybe because of the girl’s frown or for other reasons, the boy received the water melon and instantly threw it hard onto the ground. Seeing this, his friends left with anger. At that moment, the atmosphere became rather embarrassing. The girl hadn’t thought the boy would burst into anger. She was in no mood to go on with their talk, so they fixed another date to meet and then parted.
During the next meeting, the girl talked a lot to the boy. But the boy said to her coldly when they parted, “I believe in ghosts, not in God.” So after the girl returned home, she made preparations for resolving the boy’s notions when they met next time. Several days later, the boy offered to meet the girl. This time, the boy couldn’t wait to speak first, “I will wait for you for two years. If you still believe in God then, I won’t wait any longer.” After this, the boy mounted his bike and rode away, leaving the girl standing dumfounded and rooted to the ground, alone. Although soon he called to apologize, the girl only said to him, “It doesn’t matter. I think we are only fit to be friends.” Because judging from what had happened already, the girl found the boy irritable and impulsive in his actions.
As time passed by, the girl graduated and found a job in the city where her college lay. One day at work, she received a QQ message from another boy, her college classmate. “Are you online? Where do you work?” asked the boy. Without thinking much about it, the girl answered, “Near our university.” The boy replied at once, “I’m going to see a friend there within several days. See you then.” As the girl read the message, a disbelieving look swept across her face. The boy was tall, thin, dazzling, and the most handsome guy among her classmates; during their university days, they didn’t have much contact. But now, he would come to see her. This quite surprised the girl.
That day, the boy took many delicious foods to the girl’s rental house, and they had a long chat. Before leaving, the boy said to the girl, “In fact, this time I come here only for you. I have liked you for a long time.” In great surprise, the girl asked, “We even didn’t have much contact previously, so what do you like me for?” “Because I thought you are beautiful, and you will be more beautiful if you put on some make-up.” These words greatly satisfied the girl’s vanity, yet she didn’t reply. Then the boy continued, “You needn’t reply to me now. You can tell me when we meet next week.” The boy left. The girl was wavering in her heart. All humans had vanity; the girl was no exception. She also wanted her boyfriend to be handsome and admirable. Her heart was a bit touched, not knowing what to do.
So she prayed to God, “O God. I have vanity, so that despite knowing nothing about him, I just want to agree with his advance on seeing his appearance. I know I’m wrong. May You keep my heart from making the wrong decision. May You guide me to make the right choice.” Having said the prayer, the girl’s heart gradually settled down: I must tell him about my belief in God before I make any decision. Two days later, the boy called the girl, saying, “I’m going to see you this weekend. Don’t forget to consider what I asked you last time.” The girl said, “Sure. I’ve already considered it thoroughly. I’ll tell you a big thing when you come then.” The boy said, “Okay. This time I won’t live at my friend’s home, I’m going to live in your house.” Upon listening to it, the girl said, “NO! No cohabitation before marriage—this is my principle.” The boy paused for a moment and then said, “Uh … It’s getting late. Good night.” From that day on, the boy didn’t appear at the appointed time and their contact ended thus. The girl felt disappointed and the whole matter ridiculous. Meanwhile, bewilderment welled up from her heart. She felt the world a sham one, the so-called “I like you” a scheme that couldn’t withstand even a single blow.
Since then, the girl didn’t want to mention all that was connected with marriage any longer. In bewilderment, she saw God’s words say, “Your temperament, caliber, appearance, stature, family in which you were born, your job and your marriage, the entirety of you, even the color of your hair and your skin, and the time of your birth were all arranged by My hands. Even the things you do and the people you meet every single day are arranged by My hands, not to mention the fact that bringing you into My presence today is actually My arrangement. Do not throw yourself into disorder; you should proceed calmly.” Having heard the utterances of the, the girl was no longer bewildered. Since marriage was ordained and arranged by God, she believed that the one arranged by God for her was the best. So she had learned to take things as they came, to wait for God’s time to arrive.
Later, the girl left that city and went back to her hometown to begin with a new job. Sometimes, she would travel around with her childhood friend. One day, her friend introduced her to a boy. He was a junior middle-school graduate, born in the same city with the girl, and now worked in another place. She hadn’t wanted to meet the boy, but at her friend’s constant request, she had to go. The boy wasn’t tall but quite stout. What struck the girl’s heart were his smiling eyes and honest face. After the meeting, the boy went back to work and they often contacted each other via QQ and cellphone. In fact, the girl disliked only the boy’s stoutness and height, but not the boy himself. He didn’t talk much in their chat, but his every word was honest, without sweet talk. The girl thought the boy was reliable, so she told the boy, “Next time you come back, I’ll tell you something you don’t know.” The boy said, “Alright.” Before long, the boy returned home. After they met again, the girl went straight to the point, “I’m a Christian. Can you accept this?” The boy broke out smiling, saying, “I have already known about it.” The girl was stunned. Thereupon, they began to date formally. Once, the girl said to the boy, “Many people say that with some make-up I’ll be more beautiful. What’s your opinion?” Hearing this, the boy said, “I just like your plain face. You are beautiful as you are. By the way, make-up does damage to the skin. So I don’t want you to make up.” These words reminded the girl of what those boys she had met before said to her. All of a sudden, she understood that people who were truly considerate toward her wouldn’t care about her appearance. During her contact with the boy, she found that the boy was good-tempered. He didn’t lose his temper with the girl many times even when the girl made trouble out of nothing. In addition, the boy respected her very much. She always testified God’s work to the boy, and at last, the boy also believed in God. Soon, they got married.
One day, the girl saw a passage of God’s words, “One encounters many people in one’s life, but no one knows who will become one’s partner in marriage. Though everyone has their own ideas and personal stances on the subject of marriage, no one can foresee who will finally become their true other half, and one’s own notions count for little. After meeting a person you like, you can pursue that person; but whether he or she is interested in you, whether he or she is able to become your partner, is not yours to decide. The object of your affections is not necessarily the person with whom you will be able to share your life; and meanwhile someone you never expected quietly enters your life and becomes your partner, becomes the most important element in your fate, your other half, to whom your fate is inextricably bound. And so, though there are millions of marriages in the world, every one is different: How many marriages are unsatisfactory, how many are happy; how many span East and West, how many North and South; how many are perfect matches, how many are of equal rank; how many are happy and harmonious, how many painful and sorrowful; how many are the envy of others, how many are misunderstood and frowned upon; how many are full of joy, how many are awash of tears and cause despair…. Whether marriage itself brings happiness or pain, everyone’s mission in marriage is predestined by the Creator and will not change; everyone must fulfill it. And the individual fate that lies behind every marriage is unchanging; it was determined long in advance by the Creator.” The Creator’s words served as a key to the girl’s memory that had been kept in storage, and had struck a sympathetic chord in her. Now she lives with the boy who has similar ideals and beliefs with her. They often read God’s words together, explore the mysteries of life together, and enjoy the blessings of the Creator together. The girl couldn’t help uttering heartfelt gratitude and praise to the Creator for His sovereignty and arrangement. If by any chance she had chosen the boy who was handsome, tall, and thin, she didn’t know whether she could live such a blissful life this day.
She wanted to testify the Creator’s wondrous deeds to the boy and to more girls who were baffled when choosing their marriage partner. Therefore, she told the boy A Story Between a Girl and Three Boys. After hearing it, the boy said with feeling, “It’s so good that we have believed in God. Whatever is arranged by God, it’s the best for us.”
Every marriage is predestined by the Creator. When can we meet our partner for life? God has His time for it. What we can do is not rely on our likes to choose or plan, but rather, we should commit our marriage to God, let God be the decision-maker; only by doing this can we truly reap a happy marriage. In our marriage life, God also arranges lessons for us to learn. Then how should we obey God and practice God’s words in such an environment? Please go on reading relevant articles. Should you have any ideas to share with us, you can either leave us a message below this article, or contact us through online chatting on our website. May we all grow in Christ!
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