Though I Have Acne, My Life Isn’t Uncertain

By Lulu

My Good Plan for My College Life

In September 2013, I entered the gate of the college with excitement. I knew well that this is an age when people value a good-looking face. When you attend for interview, or run for a leading position in your class, people all will value your physical attractiveness first. Everyone likes handsome boys and beautiful girls; as long as you are good-looking, wherever you go, you will be extolled. On everyone’s WeChat Moments and Weibo, and in their QQ space, they all show beautiful pictures of them. I remembered I saw a picture of news before, which showed the big difference of college students’ appearance between when they first entered university and when they graduated. The latter one was thousands of times more beautiful than the former one. I also wanted such a change without exception. For finding a good job and a good partner and having a good future, since the first day I entered college, I had set this determination: During the four years of college, I must change myself into a brand-new girl. I must learn to make up, make efforts to look beautiful, and shape myself into a person who is witty and charming and well cultivated.

My Life Was Destroyed by the Unexpected Acne

However, before I began to carry out my plan, it had been completely destroyed by the unexpected acne on my face. Since then, I had to fight against the acne in my life.
After the military training in college, I began to suffer from acne. I irregularly broke out with several big zits on my forehead and cheeks, which made me feel painful and itchy. When they broke, they left red scars and thus my face looked red and blue. Shortly after, my face was scarred by acne and almost changed beyond recognition. Because of this, I felt extremely pained and anxious. I thought: In college, there is a wealth of talents. If one only has a brain but he is plain, he will still be eliminated in competition. This point can be seen from the election of leading positions of the Student Union in our college—the elected are all handsome boys and pretty girls. But now my original appearance has been changed, and then how will I distinguish myself? How will I be qualified to compete with others?

laugh, laptop, women, discuss

Once, my roommates talked about the girlfriend of a boy in our class. They discussed: “She is quite short and her face is scarred by acne. Why does he have such an eye for beauty?” These words fiercely pierced my heart. Though they didn’t target at me, their words made me feel a deep sense of shame just like my shortcoming was exposed. Facing this embarrassing situation, I could only quietly resolve: I must cure these zits on my face. However, even though I plucked up my courage to fight against these zits, I was still shocked from time to time. My teacher often said in classes: “You girls should learn to make up and dress up. In this way, you can leave a favorable impression on others, and the jobs will be available for you. You see, that student so-and-so’s clothing style and makeup are charming.” At his words, my classmates all agreed with him. But for me, I only wanted to find a crack in the earth to crawl into quickly. I couldn’t help crying out in my heart: Will my future really be ruined by these zits?

Gradually, I, a lively and outgoing girl, became isolated, self-abased and depressed. I saw my classmates’ faces were clear and pale, but in comparison I couldn’t bear to look at my own face. Thus I felt unspeakable sadness and always wanted to change the skin of my face. Because there was acne on my face, I was afraid to go out and meet people. Sometimes when I had to go out, I would wear a mouth mask all the way. Besides, in order to make the acne vanish, I tried every means. Every night I spent one or two hours washing my face with warm water and spreading masks made from traditional Chinese medicine on my face. After a term, there were many bottles of all kinds of acne treatment cream on my desk and in my cabinet and my face was covered with kinds of acne treatment cream. Nonetheless, what made me resentful was that I had used traditional Chinese medicine, Western medicine, all kinds of ointment, skin-care productions and masks, and even I had been to beauty shops, but these were useless.

Since I had the acne on my face, what I worried the most was about finding a job in the future. I thought: Now, because of my pimply face, I even don’t have the courage to go out and work as an intern. Then how will I find a job after I graduate? When the companies interview people, they first see people’s appearances…. The more I thought, the gloomier I felt my future was and the more anxious I was. And even sometimes I would secretly bawl my eyes out in my room. When I ended up in failure after trying all kinds of methods to heal my acne, I even more lost my hope for life in the future. I didn’t know when these zits would vanish, nor did I know whether I could find a job after graduation, much less how I should integrate myself into this society in which people care very much about physical attractiveness. For me, the future was out of reach and I could but live with no aim.

When I Was in Confusion, God’s Words Revealed the Source of My Problem for Me

God's words helped meHowever, just when I was extremely pained and helpless, God stretched out a saving hand to me. During one summer vacation, I had the opportunity to believe in God and read His words at home. Once, I saw God’s words: “One after another, all these trends carry an evil influence that continually degenerates man, that lowers their morals and their quality of character more and more, to the extent that we can even say the majority of people now have no integrity, no humanity, neither do they have any conscience, much less any reason. So what are these trends? You cannot see these trends with the naked eye. When the wind of a trend blows through, perhaps only a small number of people will become the trendsetters. They start off doing this kind of thing, accepting this kind of idea or this kind of perspective. The majority of people, however, in the midst of their unawareness, will still be continually infected, assimilated and attracted by this kind of trend, until they all unknowingly and involuntarily accept it, and are all submerged in and controlled by it. For man who is not of sound body and mind, who never knows what is truth, who cannot tell the difference between positive and negative things, these kinds of trends one after another make them all willingly accept these trends, the life view, the life philosophies and values that come from Satan. They accept what Satan tells them on how to approach life and the way to live that Satan “bestows” on them. They have not the strength, neither do they have the ability, much less the awareness to resist” (God Himself, the Unique VI). Carefully pondering these words, I gradually realized: It turns out that my suffering results from Satan’s deception and corruption. Satan arouses this evil trend to allow people to focus on appearance, and become immersed in the trend of “pursuing physical attractiveness.” After they accept Satan’s viewpoints of “Cosmetic surgeries can change your fate” and “Appearance decides everything,” for possessing good jobs and prospects, they begin to wildly pursue cosmetics, and do everything to make them more beautiful. And even many of them are willing to risk their lives to get plastic surgery, which causes some people’s faces to be disfigured and causes others to die or be disabled. I was also deeply bound and afflicted by this trend. Before I went to college, I had begun to plan how to make myself look pretty. When the acne destroyed my plan, I felt pained, upset and tortured, and lived in self-abasement all day and even sometimes the words or an expression of others could hurt me. All of this made me become depressed. What’s more, during my college years I was always concerned and worried about the future work and prospects, and feared that I would be eliminated by this age when people value a good-looking face. In order to heal the acne, I bought all kinds of medicines and tried every means, but when I ended up in failure, I lived more painfully and even wanted to shut myself off, staying away from the world and other people. Now I finally understood the reason why I had various troubles and sufferings was because I was controlled by the evil trend arisen by Satan and I was teased and harmed by it.

God’s Words Brightened the Hope in My Heart

After that, I saw more of God’s words: “Some people choose a good major in college and end up finding a satisfactory job after graduation, making a triumphant first stride in the journey of their lives. Some people learn and master many different skills and yet never find a job that suits them or find their position, much less have a career; at the outset of their life journey they find themselves thwarted at every turn, beset by troubles, their prospects dismal and their lives uncertain. … What occupation one pursues, what one does for a living, and how much wealth one amasses in life are not decided by one’s parents, one’s talents, one’s efforts or one’s ambitions, but are predetermined by the Creator” (God Himself, the Unique III). After reading God’s words, I suddenly saw the light. I understood: Our entire lives are in God’s hands. What occupation we pursue isn’t decided by our appearance. Instead, it’s decided according to God’s predetermination. Indeed, in real life there are such examples: Many people do well at university—it can be said they are pleased with their successes; nonetheless, when they look for work after graduation, they are thwarted at every turn. On the contrary, some other people are unremarkable at university, but after they start working, they do quite well and rise quickly. In addition, judging from objective fact, this is not to say that the one who is beautiful must have a good fate. Isn’t it the fact that many beauties die young and their fate is on the wane? And don’t many plain persons have successful careers in the world? Therefore, what kind of job and what kind of future I will have aren’t decided by my physical attractiveness. Instead, all of this is in the Creator’s hands. Thus, I should put aside my anxiety and panic, and learn to obey God’s arrangements. When I understood these, I felt I became relaxed and relieved. Then when I began to unburden my heart and no longer felt anxious for the zits on my face, I neither suffered due to others’ words nor felt worried, anxious and upset due to my future job. Instead, every day I came before God, ate and drank His words and calmly lived under His guidance. Living this way, I felt increasingly relaxed and liberated.

God’s Words Led Me to Escape From Satan’s Entrapment and Live Out a True Life

Read God's words

After graduation, I sent my resume to a training program on the internet to apply for the post of teacher. When I went to the company for an interview, seeing young teachers were smartly turned out and completely confident, I couldn’t help but feel somewhat nervous and afraid. I thought: With such an appearance, can I be selected in this position? Just when I was negative and down, I realized this was Satan’s teasing me and making me view things according to its viewpoints. Thus, I quickly prayed to God in silent and asked Him to quiet my heart. Meanwhile, I also thought of God’s words: “God’s authority and the fact of God’s sovereignty over human fate are independent of human will, do not change in accordance with man’s preferences and choices” (God Himself, the Unique III). From God’s words, I knew: Whether I can make my encounter today a positive one, and whether I can work here are within God’s grasp, within His rule. They are independent of my will, and aren’t decided by my appearance, much less in the hands of which leader of the company because each and every thought of us is in God’s hands. Now, all I want to do is to obey His sovereignty. Having understood God’s will, I became much calmer. After the interview, the following was giving a lecture. I did that as I prepared. Under God’s guidance, I knew as long as I tried my best, the rest depended on the predestination of God. So I lectured without any pressure and talked in a steady voice. It was the first time that I felt so confident and enjoyed the heart’s deliverance. However, what I did not expect was that once I was willing to submit to God’s orchestrations and arrangements, two days later, the company phoned to ask me to work there. On hearing this news, I could not restrain my excitement and joy and thanked God for allowing me to experience His sovereignty and authority.

After I started working, I saw the students were well off, fashionably dressed and knowledgeable. Yet, I was quite average in appearance and had a pimply face. Hence, I was worried that they would look down upon me and not listen to me. However, when I thought of the wonderful experience during my interview and was guided by God’s words, I gradually became relaxed and liberated in my heart. Afterward, when I was no longer restricted by physical attractiveness and appearance, and practiced being an honest man, opened up and communicated with my students, and worked with all my heart, I not only earned the respect of my students, but also obtained the approval of the schoolmasters and my students’ parents. Through these experiences, I not only truly experienced God’s sovereignty, but also tasted the sweetness of obeying God and living by His words. Thank God for His guidance, which has made me see the light in my uncertain life. All the glory be to God!

Find the Shepherd
Find the Second Coming of Jesus Christ - Let’s discover the mystery of the Lord’s second coming, watch and prepare for it, then welcome the returned Lord Jesus Christ.

Dear brothers and sisters, if you have any understanding or enlightenment from God, welcome to share with us via:1. The online chat window at the bottom of the website. 2. Send an email to [email protected].We sincerely hope we’ll grow spiritually through sharing with each other.

Find the Shepherd
Find the Second Coming of Jesus Christ - Let’s discover the mystery of the Lord’s second coming, watch and prepare for it, then welcome the returned Lord Jesus Christ.

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