One morning in early summer, Yuxuan was riding on the way to work. It was her first day at the new company. She was naturally keen to make a good impression on her manager and colleagues. So she accelerated.
After she arrived, the manager briefed her on her task, and then arranged for her to work together with Xinyu. The manager also specially told Xinyu that her former plan had great novelty value except a few kinks, which needed some slight improvements. And she expected Xinyu could design more novel plans next time. It could be seen that she put a high premium on Xinyu from her words, of which Yuxuan was particularly envious. She thought if only one day she could design a good plan like Xinyu, and be thought highly of by her manager. Such a thought cheered her inwardly.
In the afternoon, after Xinyu revised her plan, Yuxuan asked to have a look at it. Having read it, Yuxuan had to admire that Xinyu’s plan was indeed well designed and that both her train of thought and idea are original. Yuxuan’s admiration was changed to jealousy. She thought that she was not less capable than Xinyu though she just began to work, and that she couldn’t surely lose to her. She started to measure herself with Xinyu at heart, thinking that when the company opened a new project next time, she must design a better plan than that of Xinyu to impress her colleagues and manager and to achieve the esteem of her manager, and she might even get a chance of promotion.
One afternoon, the manager smiled at Yuxuan and Xinyu. “Our company has put forward a new project. You each design a plan. Then we will go through them and find the one which is more creative and valuable.” Yuxuan felt deep excitement because she finally had an opportunity to show her capability. She wanted to design a better plan than that of Xinyu, for only after she made it could she prove herself better able than Xinyu, and would she be the one that the manager regarded highly of. Yuxuan was supremely confident of success. During the following days, wherever she was, she was thinking how to design a more innovative plan. After days of work, her new plan was hammered out at last. And Xinyu finished her plan as well. They handed them to the manager together. At the moment, Yuxuan was confident. She considered the idea of her plan was pretty good with great originality, and in all probability, it would be selected. So she felt elated, eager for the final selection of the company. Two days later, the manager came to their department and said that though Yuxuan’s plan was tolerable in conception, it was not better than that of Xinyu, and therefore Xinyu’s plan would be used for this project. It was like a bolt from the blue for Yuxuan to hear that. The smile fled from her face. And her heart sank. She thought: I had expected to be thought highly of by the manager through this well-designed plan, only to get such a result in return. Won’t my effort just be in vain? The stronger my desire to show off, the more embarrassed I am. After work, she rode her bike droopingly and slowly on the way home with utter sorrow in her heart.
At night, Yuxuan reflected upon herself before God: Why did I become depressed on seeing the plan of my colleague selected by the manager? What was the cause of this? Then, Yuxuan saw the words of God, “… as soon as it involves position, face, or reputation, everyone’s heart leaps in anticipation, and you always want to stand out, to be famous, to be glorified. You are unwilling to yield, always wanting to contend, although contending is embarrassing. However, you are not content not to contend. When you see someone stand out, you are jealous, feel hatred, complain, and feel it is unfair. ‘Why can’t I stand out? Why is it never me? Why is it always he who gets to stand out and it’s never my turn?’ There is some resentment … Is not a person’s falling into these conditions a trap? This is the bondage of a satanically corrupted nature.” “Why is it that the majority of people can’t get out of negativity? Isn’t it always because of bleak prospects? … The more you seek this way the less you will reap. The greater a person’s desire for status, the more seriously they will have to be dealt with and the more they must undergo great refinement. That kind of person is too worthless! They must be dealt with and judged adequately in order for them to thoroughly let go of that. If you pursue this way until the end, you will reap nothing.” Pondering these words, Yuxuan realized what she had been pursuing was fame, gain, and status, which conflicted with God’s will. She always hoped to get ahead in life and wanted others to think highly of her. So she was jealous when she saw that her colleague Xinyu had strong ability of work and that Xinyu’s plan received recognition from the manager. And she secretly measured herself with Xinyu, attempting to show her own capability to surpass Xinyu. She spent lots of effort in writing this project plan, for the sake of her future and interests. She expected to make a great coup through this brilliant plan so that she could acquire the manager’s appreciation and attention and be promoted for an important purpose in the future. She had thought her plan would be selected. Unexpectedly, the leader selected Xinyu’s plan. So she felt uncomfortable with a little resentment. After reflection, she found the reason why she was depressed was because her desire was not satisfied and she didn’t obtain honor. At this time, she recognized that she had paid too much attention to others’ attitudes toward her and to her own status. She wanted to top the rest in everything for exaltation and commendation from others. Such a pursuit could only make herself suffer more pain, and acquire nothing, and live in emptiness at last. Having known the will of God, she was willing to turn back to put aside her jealousy and cooperate with Xinyu with one heart and one mind to protect the company’s interests. When she discarded her envy sincerely, her heart was bright and a smile spread over her face.
Several months later, the manager said there was a new project recently, and that it was the most important, so the company attached much significance to it. Then she asked Yuxuan and Xinyu to design a novel plan respectively. Hearing what the manager said, Yuxuan prayed to God silently that she was willing to set her intent right to design the plan with all her heart and strength instead of satisfying her own selfish desires. As time went by slowly, Yuxuan still didn’t thought up a good idea. She could not help thinking: How does Xinyu make out? Now I even hadn’t put my ideas into shape. If the manager ask me about my progress, how should I answer? She became restless. When she realized she was again striving for fame and gain, she prayed to God, asking Him to enlighten and guide her to discard those wrong intentions and desires. Afterward, she read the words of God: “You must learn to give up and set aside these things, to yield, to recommend others, to allow them to stand out. Do not struggle furiously and rush to take advantage as soon as you encounter an opportunity to stand out or obtain honor. Learn to back off, but do not delay the performing of your duty. Be a person who performs his duty out of the public eye, and who does not show off before others. The more you give up and set aside, the more peaceful your heart will be and the more space will open up within it, and the more your condition will improve. The more you struggle and compete, the darker will be your condition; try it if you don’t believe it. If you want to turn around this kind of condition, if you want not to be controlled by these things, then you must first set them aside and give them up. The more you struggle, the more darkness will surround you, and the jealousy and hatred within your heart will increase, and you will have a stronger desire to obtain. The stronger your desire to obtain, the less capable you will be to do so, and as you obtain less your hatred will increase. As your hatred increases you will become darker on the inside. The darker you are inside the more poorly you will perform your duty. If you perform your duty poorly you will gradually be removed from use and will be eliminated. This is an interlinked vicious cycle.” Having read God’s words, Yuxuan found the way of practice: No matter what I do, especially when do something related to my own face and status, I need to have right intentions, set aside my own interests, and pull my weight. Since I am a Christian, I should live out the likeness of a Christian. When Satan’s temptations come, I ought to practice the truth and stand on God’s side, no longer can I fight for my selfish desires like worldly people. As it will bring shame upon God’s name, and is detestable and abhorrent to Him. Yuxuan began to write after she changed her mindset. She felt the leadership and guidance of God while writing, and the inspiration was unceasing. The plan was completed in two days.
Several days later, the manager said her plan was so good that the general manager was glad to see its originality in conception, and that everyone chose it at the meeting. It was a godsend for her to hear the news. Quite unexpectedly God bestowed grace and blessings upon her when she set aside her own incorrect intentions and desires to finish her part conscientiously. Meanwhile she knew in her heart this plan was selected in virtue of the enlightenment and guidance from God rather than her ability. If God hadn’t enlightened her and given her inspiration, regardless of the effort she had put in, she would have never written it out. She truly experienced that God would bestow peace and joy upon the one who practiced according to His requirements. No matter what difficulties we encounter, as long as we come before God to seek and practice the truth, we can release ourselves from the bondage of corrupt dispositions and live in relaxation and liberation.
Thanks be to God! All the glory be to God!
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